Sense and soul in couple's therapy, Part II

I happened upon a somewhat recent article and wanted to post about it as a sort of follow up to my earlier one about meditation and science. Apparently in 2004, the Dalai Lama invited several neuroscientists to his home in Dharamsala, India, to examine brain scans of Tibetan Buddhist monks who engage in meditation on a regular basis. What scientists have found is that meditation actually does alter the structure of the brain. They call this effect neuroplasticity.

The term refers to the brain's recently discovered ability to change its structure and function, in particular by expanding or strengthening circuits that are used and by shrinking or weakening those that are rarely engaged. In its short history, the science of neuroplasticity has mostly documented brain changes that reflect physical experience and input from the outside world. In pianists who play many arpeggios, for instance, brain regions that control the index finger and middle finger become fused, apparently because when one finger hits a key in one of these fast-tempo movements, the other does so almost simultaneously, fooling the brain into thinking the two fingers are one. As a result of the fused brain regions, the pianist can no longer move those fingers independently of one another.

Weird. The external influence on the brain's structure led the scientists to explore whether or not purely internal, mental signals could likewise effect the structure. To do this, they gathered a group of novice meditators and compared the brain activity to that of the Buddhist monks who had spent more than 10,000 hours in meditation.

In a striking difference between novices and monks, the latter showed a dramatic increase in high-frequency brain activity called gamma waves during compassion meditation. Thought to be the signature of neuronal activity that knits together far-flung brain circuits, gamma waves underlie higher mental activity such as consciousness. The novice meditators "showed a slight increase in gamma activity, but most monks showed extremely large increases of a sort that has never been reported before in the neuroscience literature," says Prof. Davidson, suggesting that mental training can bring the brain to a greater level of consciousness.

On one hand this is awesome because science is now confirming meditative effects on the brain. On the other hand this is kind of lame because science is only confirming meditative effects on the brain. The really interesting effects of meditation don't happen in the brain; they happen in one's life. Meditation is truly transformative on a person's outlook regardless of physical effects. The difference is a matter of translative versus transformative. So they've translated spiritual awareness to physical brain activities? That's great. It's actually pretty awesome. But really, stop looking at the brain scans and go and meditate already. Experience the transformative side. That's so much more exciting.

Check it out: Meditation Alters Structure, Functioning

From Maysville, Episode One

First installment of "From Maysville," a weekly vodcast about Maysville Kentucky. I could say more about it, but it's really just another excuse to booze it up. Forgive the occasional tongue-tiedness. It's a lot more difficult to do a vodcast when you're drunk than it looks. I'm rather proud of myself that I didn't slide off the bar stool. : - )

I hate my recorded voice. It sounds like I have a perpetual cold.

39 ways to live, and not merely exist

I stopped reading forwarded emails a long time ago, about the time when they started threatening me with the plague or death if I didn't participate in forwarding them along -- which was pretty early. Still, I have to repost this list as it's spot on with my own personal philosophies on how to get the most out of life, even if I forget from time to time. Plus it's originally from a blog I know and love, zen habits. The only thing I'd add to the list is that you should make it a habit of repeating the following mantra as your first reaction to anything: "I never did mind about the little things." It's sort of like saying don't sweat the small stuff, but this wording comes from hottie Bridget Fonda in Point of No Return, which makes the idea a little sexier. That statement should be the first thought. The second thought should be whether it's a "little thing". It usually is. If you can train yourself to react that way every time, everything else falls into place. If you can train yourself to react that way every time, please tell me how.

In any case, the following are 39 ways to a life less zombie-like:

1. Love. Perhaps the most important. Fall in love, if you aren't already. If you have, fall in love with your partner all over again. Abandon caution and let your heart be broken. Or love family members, friends, anyone -- it doesn't have to be romantic love. Love all of humanity, one person at a time.


2. Get outside. Don't let yourself be shut indoors. Go out when it's raining. Walk on the beach. Hike through the woods. Swim in a freezing lake. Bask in the sun. Play sports, or walk barefoot through grass. Pay close attention to nature.


3. Savor food. Don't just eat your food, but really enjoy it. Feel the texture, the bursts of flavors. Savor every bite. If you limit your intake of sweets, it will make the small treats you give yourself (berries or dark chocolate are my favorites) even more enjoyable. And when you do have them, really, really savor them. Slowly.


4. Create a morning ritual. Wake early and greet the day. Watch the sun rise. Out loud, tell yourself that you will not waste this day, which is a gift. You will be compassionate to your fellow human beings, and live every moment to its fullest. Stretch or meditate or exercise as part of your ritual. Enjoy some coffee.


5. Take chances. We often live our lives too cautiously, worried about what might go wrong. Be bold, risk it all. Quit your job and go to business for yourself (plan it out first!), or go up to that girl you've liked for a long time and ask her out. What do you have to lose?


6. Follow excitement. Try to find the things in life that excite you, and then go after them. Make life one exciting adventure after another (with perhaps some quiet times in between).


7. Find your passion. Similar to the above tip, this one asks you to find your calling. Make your living by doing the thing you love to do. First, think about what you really love to do. There may be many things. Find out how you can make a living doing it. It may be difficult, but you only live once.


8. Get out of your cubicle. Do you sit all day in front of computer, shuffling papers and taking phone calls and chatting on the Internet? Don't waste your days like this. Break free from the cubicle environment, and do your work on a laptop, in a coffee shop, or on a boat, or in a log cabin. This may require a change of jobs, or becoming a freelancer. It's worth it.


9. Turn off the TV. How many hours will we waste away in front of the boob tube? How many hours do we have to live? Do the math, then unplug the TV. Only plug it back in when you have a DVD of a movie you love. Otherwise, keep it off and find other stuff to do. Don't know what to do? Read further.


10. Pull away from Internet. You're reading something on the Internet right now. And, with the exception of this article, it is just more wasting away of your precious time. You cannot get these minutes back. Unplug the Internet, then get out of your office or house. Right now! And go and do something.


11. Travel. Sure, you want to travel some day. When you have vacation time, or when you're older. Well, what are you waiting for? Find a way to take a trip, if not this month, then sometime soon. You may need to sell your car or stop your cable bill and stop eating out to do it, but make it happen. You are too young to not see the world. If need be, find a way to make a living by freelancing, then work while you travel. Only work an hour or two a day. Don't check email but once a week. Then use the rest of the time to see the world.


12. Rediscover what's important. Take an hour and make a list of everything that's important to you. Add to it everything that you want to do in life. Now cut that list down to 4-5 things. Just the most important things in your life. This is your core list. This is what matters. Focus your life on these things. Make time for them.


13. Eliminate everything else. What's going on in your life that's not on that short list? All that stuff is wasting your time, pulling your attention from what's important. As much as possible, simplify your life by eliminating the stuff that's not on your short list, or minimizing it.


14. Exercise. Get off the couch and go for a walk. Eventually try running. Or do some push ups and crunches. Or swim or bike or row. Or go for a hike. Whatever you do, get active, and you'll love it. And life will be more alive.


15. Be positive. Learn to recognize the negative thoughts you have. These are the self-doubts, the criticisms of others, the complaints, the reasons you can't do something. Then stop yourself when you have these thoughts, and replace them with positive thoughts. Solutions. You can do this!


16. Open your heart. Is your heart a closed bundle of scar tissue? Learn to open it, have it ready to receive love, to give love unconditionally. If you have a problem with this, talk to someone about it. And practice makes perfect.


17. Kiss in the rain. Seize the moment and be romantic. Raining outside? Grab your lover and give her a passionate kiss. Driving home? Stop the car and pick some wildflowers. Send her a love note. Dress sexy for him.


18. Face your fears. What are you most afraid of? What is holding you back? Whatever it is, recognize it, and face it. Do what you are most afraid of. Afraid of heights? Go to the tallest building, and look down over the edge. Only by facing our fears can we be free of them.


19. When you suffer, suffer. Life isn't all about fun and games. Suffering is an inevitable part of life. We lose our jobs. We lose our lovers. We lose our pets. We get physically injured or sick. A loved one becomes sick. A parent dies. Learn to feel the pain intensely, and really grieve. This is a part of life -- really feel the pain. And when you're done, move on, and find joy.


20. Slow down. Life moves along at such a rapid pace these days. It's not healthy, and it's not conducive to living. Practice doing everything slowly -- everything, from eating to walking to driving to working to reading. Enjoy what you do. Learn to move at a snail's pace.


21. Touch humanity. Get out of your house and manicured neighborhoods, and find those who live in worse conditions. Meet them, talk to them, understand them. Live among them. Be one of them. Give up your materialistic lifestyle.


22. Volunteer. Help at homeless soup kitchens. Learn compassion, and learn to help ease the suffering of others. Help the sick, those with disabilities, those who are dying.


23. Play with children. Children, more than anyone else, know how to live. They experience everything in the moment, fully. When they get hurt, they really cry. When they play, they really have fun. Learn from them, instead of thinking you know so much more than them. Play with them, and learn to be joyful like them.


24. Talk to old people. There is no one wiser, more experienced, more learned, than those who have lived through life. They can tell you amazing stories. Give you advice on making a marriage last or staying out of debt. Tell you about their regrets, so you can learn from them and avoid the same mistakes. They are the wisdom of our society -- take advantage of their existence while they're still around.


25. Learn new skills. Constantly improve yourself instead of standing still -- not because you're so imperfect now, but because it is gratifying and satisfying. You should accept yourself as you are, and learn to love who you are, but still try to improve -- if only because the process of improvement is life itself.


26. Find spirituality. For some, this means finding God or Jesus or Allah or Buddha. For others, this means becoming in tune with the spirits of our ancestors, or with nature. For still others, this just means an inner energy. Whatever spirituality means for you, rediscover it, and its power.


27. Take mini-retirements. Don't leave the joy of retirement until you are too old to enjoy it. Do it now, while you're young. It makes working that much more worth it. Find ways to take a year off every few years. Save up, sell your home, your possessions, and travel. Live simply, but live, without having to work. Enjoy life, then go back to work and save up enough money to do it again in a couple of years.


28. Do nothing. Despite the tip above that we should find excitement, there is value in doing nothing as well. Not doing nothing as in reading, or taking a nap, or watching TV, or meditating. Doing nothing as in sitting there, doing nothing. Just learning to be still, in silence, to hear our inner voice, to be in tune with life. Do this daily if possible.


29. Stop playing video games. They might be fun, but they can take up way too much time. If you spend a lot of time playing online games, or computer solitaire, or Wii or Gameboy or whatever, consider going a week without it. Then find something else to do, outside.


30. Watch sunsets, daily. One of the most beautiful times of day. Make it a daily ritual to find a good spot to watch the sunset, perhaps having a light dinner while you do so.


31. Stop reading magazines. They're basically crap. And they waste your time and money. Cancel your subscriptions and walk past them at the news stands. If you have to read something, read a trashy novel or even better, read Dumb Little Man once a day and be done.


32. Break out from ruts. Do you do things the same way every day? Change it up. Try something new. Take a different route to work. Start your day out differently. Approach work from a new angle. Look at things from new perspectives.


33. Stop watching the news. It's depressing and useless. If you're a news junky, this may be difficult. I haven't watch TV news or read a newspaper regularly in about two years. It hasn't hurt me a bit. Anything important, my mom tells me about.


34. Laugh till you cry. Laughing is one of the best ways to live. Tell jokes and laugh your head off. Watch an awesome comedy. Learn to laugh at anything. Roll on the ground laughing. You'll love it.


35. Lose control. Not only control over yourself, but control over others. It's a bad habit to try to control others -- it will only lead to stress and unhappiness for yourself and those you try to control. Let others live, and live for yourself. And lose control of yourself now and then too.


36. Cry. Men, especially, tend to hold in our tears, but crying is an amazing release. Cry at sad movies. Cry at a funeral. Cry when you are hurt, or when somebody you love is hurt. It releases these emotions and allows us to cleanse ourselves.


37. Make an awesome dessert. I like to make warm, soft chocolate cake. But even berries dipped in chocolate, or crepes with ice cream and fruit, or fresh apple pie, or homemade chocolate chip cookies or brownies, are great. This isn't an every day thing, but an occasional treat thing. But it's wonderful.


38. Try something new, every week. Ask yourself: "What new thing shall I try this week?" Then be sure to do it. You don't have to learn a new language in one week, but seek new experiences. Give it a try. You might decide you want to keep it in your life.


39. Be in the moment. Instead of thinking about things you need to do, or things that have happened to you, or worrying or planning or regretting, think about what you are doing, right now. What is around you? What smells and sounds and sights and feelings are you experiencing? Learn to do this as much as possible through meditation, but also through bringing your focus back to the present as much as you can in everything you do.

- Leo Babuata

How to distinguish humans from machines

Allow me to borrow from the now immortal Vonnegut, as he explains in the novel Breakfast of Champions (1973) the motivation behind abstract expressionism. He's talking about a painting by the fictional artist Rabo Karabekian, entitled The Temptation of Saint Anthony. The painting was twenty feet wide and sixteen feet high. It was simple: a field of "Hawaiian Avocado" with a single vertical stripe of dayglo orange reflecting tape.



As the story goes, the painting was sold to an arts center for a whopping price tag of $50,000. The towns people were outraged. They were pissed that the chairman of the center paid so much for such a simple piece of art.

Karabekian was in a cocktail lounge and made some remark that a waitress found offensive. She replied: "Well, we don't think much of your painting. I've seen better pictures done by a five-year-old."

And here is Karabekian's brilliant response, from the book:

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"I have read the editorial against my painting in your wonderful newspaper. I have read every word of the hate mail you have been thoughtful enough to send to New York."

This embarrassed people some.

"The painting did not exist until I made it," Karabekian went on. "Now that it does exist, nothing would make me happier than to have it reproduced again and again, and vastly improved upon, by all the five-year-olds in town. I would love for your children to find pleasantly and playfully what it took me many angry years to find.

"I now give you my word of honor," he went on, "that the picture your city owns shows everything about life which truly matters, with nothing left out. It is a picture of the awareness of every animal. It is the immaterial core of every animal -- the 'I am' to which all messages are sent. It is all that is alive in any of us -- in a mouse, in a deer, in a cocktail waitress. It is unwavering and pure, no matter what preposterous adventure may befall us. A sacred picture of Saint Anthony alone is one vertical, unwavering band of light. If a cockroach were near him, or a cocktail waitress, the picture would show two such bands of light. Our awareness is all that is alive and maybe sacred in any of us. Everything else about us is dead machinery.

"I have just heard from this cocktail waitress here, this vertical band of light, a story about her husband and an idiot who was about to be executed at Shepherdstown. Very well -- let a five-year-old paint a sacred interpretation of that encounter. Let a five-year-old strip away the idiocy, the bars, the waiting electric chair, the uniform of the guard, the gun of the guard, the bones and the meat of the guard. What is that perfect picture which any five-year-old can paint? Two unwavering bands of light."

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-Kurt Vonnegut, Breakfast Of Champions

20 x 16 foot canvas with avocado paint and a strip of dayglo orange tape: $50,000
Illustrating the awareness in individuals that distinguish them from machines: Priceless

var Kentucky = new Array("Wired", "Hickish", "Amish")

Awhile back I wrote about how Kentucky's long-held hillbilly image was being reconsidered in light of efforts to wire every corner of the state, and to woo tech-heavy businesses to the area (See: When did Kentucky become cool?). Unfortunately whatever steps forward Kentucky made to look like a progressive region, it took leaps back recently when the media latched onto the controversy surrounding the opening of the Creation Museum (technically Northern Kentucky, but might as well be Cincinnati). The media has us looking like hicks again.

I'm not going to comment too much on the Creation Museum myself, except to say that if you're going to invoke science as a religious explanation, it's no longer under the scope of religion. It becomes the realm of science, which automatically makes it subject to peer-review. If you don't want the criticism, don't invoke science.

That's not what I wanted to talk about here, though. What we're talking about is stereotypes. Kentucky is actually pretty diverse. My question: How can any universal statement be made about a region where you routinely encounter the following at the local supermarket?


(photo shot by mobile phone, apologize for the quality)

Obviously the region isn't that homogenous when Amish are shopping at the grocery store, while I'm running around snapping pics with a mobile phone and checking my email on a laptop that's swiping wi-fi from the Super 8 motel down the street : )

Kentucky != "Hick". Kentucky = Array.

For those who hated the Sopranos finale

[Updated to remove some inaccuracies. Instead, read this. It just blows your mind. The last episode was a carefully executed example of how to use symbolism brilliantly. Tony didn't just get wacked; he practically got a Catholic funeral.]

The good and bad of crowd-sourcing

When Google unveiled their latest project, Street View, recently, I doubt anyone over there expected such a collective back lash from privacy advocates. I mean, the service is really cool. Available in select cities, Google now allows you to zoom in on their maps and see what things look like at street level. This isn't CG. I once rented Spiderman 2 for the Xbox just so I could take a virtual tour of New York and climb to the top of the Empire State Building like King Kong. I was a bit disappointed because it didn't feel "real" enough. Google's Street View doesn't disappoint. It's actual photos spliced together and is very immersive.

Perhaps that's the problem. It's a little too real. They are actual photos taken by Google crew driving around in this van, which was caught in a reflection as it was driving by a window. That's not the only thing caught on camera. I can imagine the guys in the van thinking it was funny when they also snapped photos of girls sunbathing, some dude going into an adult bookstore, some dude coming out of a strip club, and a guy breaking into a house (among others). Some photos have since been removed like the infamous guy peeing on the side of the road and the poor girl whose thong was showing as she was getting out of a truck. The privacy advocates raised the red flag when it was revealed that in some of the photos you could see into people's houses. I'm sure Google's photo-taking policies are in the process of being revised.

So how did all these photos in a haystack surface? That's the power of crowds. Google serves millions of users per day. Whole groups of users, right now as you are reading this, are scrutinizing every inch of Street View looking for interesting photos. In this particular case, that's come back to bite Google in the arse. Millions of judging eyeballs is the downside of having a huge user base. But when it works to their advantage, it's called crowd-sourcing. Huge tasks, like maintaining articles at Wikipedia and protecting them from vandals is turned over to the crowd itself. This greatly reduces the amount of time and money spent on paid moderators by replacing them with volunteers. Yahoo bought Flickr as a replacement for its photo service exactly because Flickr has self-maintaining crowd-sourcing features built-in. Though the deal cost them millions, they need less of a work force to work it, and end up saving much more in the short long-run.

It sounds like a lazy way of getting something for nothing, and it sort of is. Still, crowd-sourcing shows promise in solving real problems. Computers are great because they can automate tasks. Unfortunately computers aren't human, and there are some things only humans (currently) can do. For example, "Optical Character Recognition" (OCR) can be used to scan books and turn them into digitized text that can be searched. It works great on clearly printed books, but when dealing with old worn manuscripts and handwritten journals, OCR starts encountering problems. Is that a lower-case "a" or an "o"? Only humans can currently tell the difference. This very same idea is used in CAPTCHA, or "word verification" spam deterrent systems. Spam bots can't tell if that's an "a" or an "o" either. It just so happens that about 60 million CAPTCHAs are solved by humans around the world every day. This few seconds of individual human deciphering translates to more than 150,000 hours of work each day. Imagine if that could be put to use somehow, like maybe translating characters OCR can't recognize. Well guess what, it is. Check out reCAPTCHA, a service doing exactly that.

Who knows what future problems crowd-sourcing will solve? Reading books while fighting spam is new way of harnessing its power, but crowd sourcing isn't exactly new. SETI years ago started using volunteer's excess computer processing power to scan the skies for extraterrestrials. Similar projects likewise borrow processing speed to crunch data on AIDS research. The "some dudes" of the world are probably planning really complex uses we can't even imagine yet. At the very least crowd-sourcing keeps us honest, as in pointing out Google's unintentional transition to Big Brother. I'm still trying to figure out how to crowd-source my finances. If only one million people would send me a buck...

Fantasy art, then and now

Some recent 3-D work for clients of mine have left my computer littered with modeling programs. I figured I might use them to create some fantasy art, because there's so much you can do in that genre with today's software — just look at the Lord of the Rings movies. Fantasy art is the sci-fi, magical genre of dragons, wizards, fairies and other fantastical and mythical creatures. For an example of a computer gen fairy I've made, check out the home page of iSprites.com, my severely neglected software development company.

So anyway, I was thinking about different projects to work on, and looking at other people's work for ideas, when it donned on me that fantasy art goes way back. In fact, I think John William Waterhouse (1849-1917) is the grandaddy of fantasy art. Waterhouse was most known for his paintings of female characters from mythology and literature. Many of his paintings, including A Mermaid (1901, pictured left) would certainly be considered fantasy art if presented as such today. The Sorceress (1913) could grace any Dungeons and Dragons novel. Many of his paintings share similar qualities.

The fantasy aspect in Waterhouse's work obviously comes from the mythological subject matter and his focus on the feminine. Fantasy art shouldn't be confused with sexual fantasy. It's more about dragons, fairies, mythology and folklore. Still, actual mythology is full of the feminine, and isn't shy about sex. Likewise, modern fantasy art, especially work by Luis Royo and others, is among the more popular pop-art erotic paintings.

I don't think any of John William Waterhouse's contemporaries were doing anything remotely similar. I think his work is pretty unique for the period and certainly contributes to modern fantasy art.

John William Waterhouse Gallery

Chicks Digg Sk*rt

Not sure exactly why, but chicks dig my blog. 3 out of 5 visitors are women. How do I know this? Well, it's easy when only five people show up and you know all five of them : ) I talk a lot about stereotypically male-centric things, so it's about time that I post one just for the ladies.

Digg for women. You're probably familiar with the social linking website Digg.com. If not, you should be. If not, you haven't been reading my posts. Like here, Digg is more for the guys, mostly because it's tech heavy and tech is traditionally a guy thing. Hey, don't bite my head off. I'm with you. Women should be more into tech. Scriptkitties are hot. But girls aren't typically wooed by gadgets like guys are. They're, like, into girl stuff. Where can a girl find girl stuff along with the nifty social linking features of Digg? Try sk*rt.

Sk*rt is built off the same model as Digg, but it's all female. Here's the blurb:

sk*rt is a social media ranking platform of pure goodness. A portal to find cool things, smart scoop, clever ideas, excellent products, exceptional information. All of it. And more. In other words, sk*rt is like that friend who always finds the best stuff. Only better.

Enjoy ladies! sk*rt

Art is temporary if it imitates life

My friends and I were sitting around bored one day, years ago, and this boredom somehow led to the strange idea that we should paint a mural deep inside the culverts near the school. We didn't give it any thought. We just woke up one day, bought a bunch of candles, $40 worth of spray paint, and snuck down into the ground when no one was looking. Not sure how much the fumes from the spray paint contributed, but it was a jolly good time. The odd thing is that we knew it wouldn't last. It was a drainage tunnel which meant the water would eventually wash away all the dragons and nifty quotes and bizarre symbols we painted. I thought of that when I came across the much more interesting 337 Project.



I'm a fan of remodeling projects involving old buildings. My parents own a three-story building in downtown Maysville, Kentucky, and given enough time and money I'd have that place completely tricked out. It was built some time in the 1800s and is still solid, but let's face it, some buildings are destined for the wrecking ball no matter what. The old Oquirrh School, at 337 South 400 East in Salt Lake City, Utah, is such a place. It's scheduled for demolition in July to make way for Utah's first all-green, mixed-use loft-style condominiums. Rather than letting the building go quietly into the Good Night, officials turned it over to 144 local artists to have their way with it. The result: A 20,000 square foot canvas, with no inch left untouched (see slideshow above).

It's beautiful. It's temporary. Such is art if it imitates life.

I am so turning my own home over to volunteer artists if and when I ever get settled.

Check it out: 337 Project